Do you own a book that you love, but that you’ve never read?
My To Be Read (TBR) pile takes up three shelves. It’s full of books I’ve bought while browsing bookstores—remember those days? There are books recommended by friends, or book club books I never got around to really reading because something more interesting was calling to me.
My TBR Shelves (because let’s be real, nobody could reasonably call this a pile anymore), includes books written by friends, and books written by conference presenters.
But one book on my TBR shelves was a gift from someone special.
My mom was my personal book shopper. While I was busy working and raising kids, she would cut book reviews from newspapers and the bookstore newsletter and save these in a file folder. When my birthday or Christmas came along, she’d buy me a few books. Some of these ended up being great bestsellers, like the Outlander series by Diana Gabaldon (when there were only two books in the series). Some recognized my love of the King Author legend, including Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Some were by authors whose works have faded from public memory. But every one of these books, without fail, was a perfect fit for me.
One particular book gifted by my mom has stayed on my TBR pile through many life events. The last book my mom ever bought me was The Sea, by John Banville. I’ve heard it’s a great literary work that has stood the test of time. I don’t know. I’ve never read it.
I don’t remember what other books she gave me that birthday or Christmas over 10 years ago, but this is the one I never got around to reading. I was busy taking care of kids, volunteering in the schools, and for Girl Scouts and a Lego Robotics team. When I found time to read, I was sitting in doctor’s appointments, or waiting in the car during sports practice–I read something light and easy to pick up and put down.
The Sea waited.
The Sea waited while I got divorced and restarted my professional career. It followed me through two moves with unfortunate but necessary book purges, boomerang children with health issues, and a new marriage.
The Sea found a new home when I recently color coded by TBR shelves for visual appeal. This makes my daughter, who worked three years in a bookstore, completely crazy. That’s another reason I do it. It’s good for her to have her tightly held beliefs challenged! And it’s only fair. Many of my TBR books where purchased when I went to visit her at work. Who can walk into a bookstore without buying a book – even when you have the best intensions, and a mountain of books at home waiting to be read.
I’ve made a goal for 2021 to read more from my To Be Read pile. I’m positive there are some gems on those shelves. (Follow me on Goodreads and Instagram if you want to track my progress.) I’m going to try to read from my “backlist” at least once a month.
But I don’t think I’ll ever read The Sea.
My mom died three years ago after an extended illness. As long as this last book sits in my TBR pile, my mom is still here, reminding me she cared enough to collect those reviews, to pour over them on each occasion to select the perfect books—because she knew me. Sure, I could still see The Sea if I read it and put it on the “books I’m keeping” shelf. But somehow, on the TBR pile, it still has potential. The potential to remind me that my mom and I had a special bond. That my mom supported my love of books. That my mom encouraged me to be a writer.
The Amazon description of The Sea starts: “In this luminous new novel about love, loss and the unpredictable power of memory…”. Yes, this perfectly sums up what this book means to me. Love. Loss. And the Power of Memory.
Do you have a book that reminds you of someone special? Is there a special book on your TBR pile that you’ve been waiting to read until the time is just right? Will that time be this year? Tell me about it.
Jenny Lang is an Author currently working on a novel inspired by the life of Sarah Winchester, builder of the Winchester Mystery House in San Jose, California. If you would like to be notified when the book is available, please sign up here.